and bingo was his name-o!
Well Happy Valentine’s Day to the TOASTER. My ex just broke my knee. Actually, it’s not broken (ACL-how cool is that?), but it has rendered me a temporary cripple.
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We love getting screwed! |
We were returning from a party and horsing around. She pushed me. I fell awkwardly. My kneecap got scared. Ran around to the back of my leg to hide. Next up: the ambulance ride, the saline drip, and a nice person gave me a shot of some kind of opiate that sent me to a beautiful dream world. Then I got horny and tried to convince the ex or the pretty nurse to climb into the cot with me and ‘cuddle’.
If anyone asks, of course, I was protecting vigorously the honor of a flock of nuns (flocks or herds?) against the unwanted advances of Motley Crue — it’ll be in edition 3 of “The Dirt.” I WAS NOT BEATEN UP BY A GIRL! I’m counting on you to spread pro-TOASTER propaganda to the masses — THEY MUST NOT KNOW THE TRUTH.
Yes, I was drunk.
No, we are not back together.
What has 79 balls and screws old ladies?
BINGO!
